The Three Count Blog

So I haven’t done Raw thoughts in a little bit. I could go wild with a bunch of excuses, but I won’t - I just haven’t been feeling it. Haven’t felt the need to write a bunch of words about shows that have been a mix of good, bad and ugly. But enough about The Great Khali.

Today I’m brimming with optimism, happiness, and pride. Things have been going pretty well for me. I’m gonna take a moment to brag, if you don’t mind. It’s OK if you don’t read. I get it.

I’m exercising a bit more lately, and have decided to take the plunge and try DDP Yoga. I don’t need to tell you that the transformation of the likes of Jake Roberts, Arthur Boorman (watch that video if you haven’t, man) and others have been absolutely beyond inspirational. I’ve always been a bit of a big guy, but mostly due to my own laziness and nothing else. I’m 23, and I keep putting off getting in shape because I’m so young. There’s no sense in that - now’s the time that I should be building towards habits of good health. I’ll keep you posted.

In other news, I’m writing for fun again. Creative writing has never been something I’ve been any good at, but it’s definitely something that I’ve always drawn a fair bit of pleasure from. I took a long break from writing, which is a shame since the majority of my writing is only for me, so I was the only one who suffered from this self-imposed sabbatical. I’ve made plans to join an efed, an old hobby of mine, just to keep myself on a schedule of consistently putting (proverbial) pen to paper. I’m excited to revisit some old characters and play my nerdy, nerdy fantasy game again. Best part is that a lot of the old crew I used to fed with are getting back together too, so the excitement will be there across the board.

Work has been going fantastically as well. I can’t really speak to any specifics for confidentiality reasons, but I’m making a lateral move to help build something new, which is exciting and really professionally fulfilling for me. It’s new challenges ahead that will make going to work fun on a daily basis. Not to say it isn’t already, but again, new is always better. Stinson out.

Except not. I still have more chatter to drone on about. Congrats if you’re still with me. Have a cookie. Cookies not included. Supply your own. I’m not a damn cookie factory. Get it together, Ricky. I know, you’re probably not Ricky, but if you are, you’re really, really interested in the last bit of this rambling mess. And that’s a good thing, because here comes the gushy part.

Today, I got a new brother in law. This came as a complete shock - my sister and her now husband had been quite serious for some time and were certainly walking down that road, but it came as a happy surprise that they got married today on the ocean. As I’ve gotten a bit older and become an adult, my older sister’s friendship and love has become all the more important to me. I’m so damn happy to see her happy and can’t wait to celebrate with her and my new brother.

I don’t know if it’s just a spring thing or what, but things are really looking up for me right now and I really, really enjoy it.

Anyhow, that’s about it for now. I’m done. Feed the cats, Ricky, they’re starving. 

I don’t want to get too heavy-handed, talking about the horrific events in Boston Monday. I work at a call centre here in Canada, and deal with a great deal of American clients. Not often in the Boston area, but the occasional call does come in from there. I found out what happened from an hysterical customer and needless to say, it shook me up a bit.

So all I wanted to do Monday night was relax, drink a few beers with my good friend Luke and enjoy some wrestling and take my mind off of Boston. I appreciated, in a way, that it was business as usual for WWE on Monday night (not that I enjoyed the business at hand, but that’s for later in this rant). The channel that plays Raw in Canada kept on playing the footage of the day’s tragedy during commercial breaks, but at least I didn’t have to be reminded during the show.

Unfortunately, as far as being entertained goes, this Raw missed the mark big-time.

I’m not one to moan and complain about WWE. I watch Raw because I generally speaking enjoy the show. I usually don’t allow one or two bad moves spoil that enjoyment. That said, it seemed like WWE was purposely trying to undo all of their great work from last week in one fell swoop, and it was really, really frustrating to watch.

Roving Thoughts

• First, something lighthearted before I get into ranty-mode. It was funny to read all over the WRESTLING NEWZZZ sites last week that Vince McMahon was thrilled with the reaction that Fandango got on Raw. I mean, sure, he probably was - all those iTunes sales and social media conversations were likely well received - but everyone seemed to think that Fandangoing was going to be the next big thing and wasn’t going to be nipped in the bud in whatever way possible.
  
  Honestly, I don’t really care one way or the other; I prefer Fandango as a heel, and I don’t think this is the end of the line for his popularity by any stretch, but it does make me smile to see something from a mile away that others are blind to.
  
  

• I really hate the WWE’s propensity to have their mid-level champions lose their titles for no reason as of…well, I’d say as of late, but it’s been this way since the mid 2000s, so what’re you going to do? It’s not that I wanted Antonio Cesaro to never lose the title, and it’s nice to see Kofi Kingston with some sort of purpose in life beyond “does nifty parkour shit at the Royal Rumble and MITB since John Morrison stopped working here.”
  
  It’s the complete lack of build, the complete lack of context and the complete lack of reason that bothers me. I don’t watch WWE expecting it to be a sport, nor do I want it to be. That said, this work of fiction is indeed framed as being one, so I’d really like it if there had been any reason for me to believe that Kofi Kingston deserves a title shot against a champion who has been dominant since winning the title some 240-odd days ago.
  
  OK, I’m being too negative. This was a good match. It was just a bad result. Also, Kofi Kingston, who’s billed from Ghana, saying that the US title is back home in America made me laugh out loud, so at least there was that.
  
  

• I do need to see some of the silver lining, I guess. R-Truth got a win, apropos of nothing. I really want to like that guy. Again, he beat the Intercontinental Champion WAH BARRAH for no real reason at all, but yeah. Wut’s Up.
  
  

• Also, Brock Lesnar destroying 3MB was a really awesome visual. I have my doubts about Brock/Triple H 3, but I guess the rubber match makes sense, and perhaps we’ll get some firm finality between those two.
  
  

• I suppose I get what they’re doing with Ziggler as the vulnerable champion, and he and Swagger had a good little match, but I think that the Money in the Bank gimmick sort of immediately calls the champion’s credibility into question anyhow. I don’t think that having your World Champion lose clean-ish makes much/any sense in this case. Again, silver lining, it was a good match, and with the dissension between Teddy and Booker this week and between Booker and Brickie last week, it may mean that we get some sort of sense of who the hell’s actually in charge shortly.
  
  

• Aw, Punk, don’t leave us. I mean, do, because you need to heal, but still. That was a pretty great segment that showed off why Punk is awesome. The guy said all of two sentences and made them into a great promo.
  
  

• Also excellent - Mark Henry, clubbering anyone he damn well pleases. I think the Sheamus/Henry feud was the last time that Sheamus was charming to me (oh the difference a year can make), so I guess I support these two linking up on that basis alone. Also, it frees up Randy Orton and Big Show to have a more focussed feud. Speaking of Randy, he’s been subtly more face-ish lately. He almost seems to be having fun in his role, which makes him more fun to watch.
  
  

• OK. Ryback turn. This is the part where I complain the most, and the loudest. I have about 5 different pop culture references I want to use to explain why this is a bad idea, but for your sanity and mine, I’m limiting myself to two. With the exception of this one, that isn’t linked to anything - I hate Daniel Tosh. I know, it’s apropos of nothing, but his show’s on in the background where I’m writing this and I can hear it and I HATE HIM I HATE HIM I HATE HIM.
  
  

• I don’t mean to date myself too much, but when I was a young lad, I was way into Pokemon. When I say Pokemon, I mean the kind on the original Gameboy, back when there was only 151 Pokemon to speak of. Simpler times. I absolutely loved the cartoon to the point where the only original run programming I watched in the run of a week was the Pokemon cartoon, Monday Night Raw and WCW Saturday Night.
  
  As I said, I loved that cartoon, but as the fad started to die away, and the excitement of everyone talking about it on a daily basis began to fade, I started to notice certain tropes. The main character, Ash, had his beloved Pikachu as his main Pokemon. Of course, throughout his travels, Ash would inevitably pick up other Pokemon along his travels. Inevitably, these new, shiny Pokemon would begin to outshine Pikachu, and for whatever reason, Ash would get rid of them.
  
  John Cena is essentially Pikachu.
  
  

• Honestly, it was a good turn for Ryback. The promo had a great, old-school feel, and Ryback’s reasons for turning were solid. See, a good heel tells the truth but is sort of a dick about it. Ryback indeed did well in this regard, and showed a lot of intensity. Of course, it wasn’t how he turned, it was that he turned that irked me.
  
  I know, I sort of stopped writing on this blog on a regular basis just shortly after Ryback’s debut, but I really, really grew to love the guy. See, Ryback was a babyface who had been a babyface his entire run in WWE (yeah, Skip Sheffield, but that guy doesn’t exist anymore, kinda like that Johnny Curtis guy) and rose to the top as such. This doesn’t happen in WWE much, and it was exciting to see them working on a babyface as hard as they do on heels from his debut. It was refreshing, because it was different. Now they’ve undone this…and where does Ryback go after he loses to Cena?
  
  

• It’s not as if there’s not another fucking heel in this company, for crying out loud. Mark Henry? Jack Swagger? Hell, Antonio Cesaro just lost the US title. There are a lot of top-or-near-the-top-level talents that Cena could have taken on rather than turning the hottest-rising babyface in the company.
  
  

• It’s something new for Cena, I guess, but it’s not at the same time. John Cena honestly reminds me of Dane Cook at times. See, Cook had a really exciting rise to the top of the comedy world. He was the toast of the industry for a while, but suddenly his schtick was tired, overplayed and predictable.
  
  Then, while no one was watching, when everyone had written him off, Dane Cook got remarkably better. I mean, he was still essentially the same guy, but he seemed to be trying harder and put out some really great, quality material.
  
  We’ve reached the end of that story with John Cena, and it seems he’s looping back to being the underdog against the monster of the week. It’s going to kill Ryback’s momentum dead and it breaks my heart.
  
  

I don’t want to act like I know what’s going to happen on Monday Night Raw with the likes of John Cena and Ryback. Chris Jericho once said something to the effect of “shut the fuck up and let us finish our story.” The problem is, I’ve seen this movie before. It’d have to be a hell of a Shyamalan moment for me to want to pay attention and to not be disappointed, ultimately.

Save us, England. Christ.

Spoiler for my Raw review - fuck.